Sacrifice
by immagina
Summary: [Finally Edited!] Ryoko finally succeeded in taking Tenchi to Jurai to save Aeka. What were her thoughts when she went back to the ship? What did she realize? Did she finally sigh in resignation? r&r !


**A/N::.** iya!! finally...after almost a _year_!!! *sighs* this fic has been edited!!! ^_^ anywayz, I don't know why I'm fond of writing angst/death fics...(hehe...if you reviewed and read my other fics from other animes, you'll know what I'm talking about, ne?)..anwayz...hope you'll enjoy reading this...spoilers for the episode, "No Need for Ryoko". and once again...this is an anngst/drama fic..from ryoko's pov. Most of the readers here will probably not remember this fic (as I told before, this has not been touched for almost a year) but I still hope that you'll read and review this. ^_^ **.::**

**Disclaimers::.** the following characters mentioned in this fic...are not mine...will never be...they belong to their respective owners...so onegai...don't sue me!!_.::_

::. comments are freely acepted, but flames will be ridiculed at ^^x, so just mail me at kitsune21@rukawa.zzn.com or  chesca14316@yahoo.com .::

 r & r minna!! (readers:: yare, yare…)  let me know what you think!! 

ok, enough with babblings!! 

=============================================================================================================

**_~Sacrifice~_**

*           *            *                                                                                                         

Demon.

Merciless.

Killer.

Infamous space pirate of all time.

Number one wanted criminal of the Galaxy Police.

Cold Heart.

Uncared.

_Unloved_.

That's what I am, so I deserve to die like this. After all, I have to make amends and be punished just the way I've slaughtered innocent people. Their voices still seem to echo on my mind, as if haunting me of the preposterous, evil things I did. I tried to ignore it, tried to cover my ears with my bloodied hands. Yet, nothing changed and my body failed to obey me. The frantic voices, heart-wrenching screams are still there. 

I know.

I deserve _it_. 

I, Ryoko, the demoness space pirate, is destined to die like this, harmed, hurt, pained...unloved. Silly and ironic, isn't it? I _mustn't_ have any feelings...yet I _have_. I shouldn't have a _heart_...but I _do. _ I am not born—no, _created_ to be weak...but to be strong and to kill innocent people...but look at me now. 

_Weak. _

I feel more blood ooze from my re-opened wound, as life slowly passes by me and as my vision begins to blur. Then, my thoughts eventually drift to a certain chocolate-eyed boy with breathtaking features... and a soft, loving heart. Then I feel my own heart twinge for a moment as I begin to contemplate about him. How could I be so stupid to hope that someday he'll love me...accept me and look at me as a _person_...not as a heartless machine??

There he is right now, wearing clothes suitable for fighting, sword ready to be unleashed anytime, with an unwavering look mixed with irrefutable courage...to save the princess. 

_His_ princess. 

How come I did not think of it earlier, before it led me to this point? My rival's a princess, all right, with a good morale...as she put it. I fought with her countless times, exchanged angry looks and words of sarcasm. I thought the words that spat out from her mouth were untrue...but, once again, I'm wrong. All the hurting words she'd imparted me...were all true. 

We're so much different...She and I. 

She is innocent and pure, as I am sinister and evil. She is a princess...to be saved by a handsome prince in shining armor and riding a white horse...ready to do anything for her...as I am a demoness pirate...wandering incessantly in space, killing people without emotions, destroying homes heedlessly. I am to be arrested...to be killed in return...to _die_. 

How can I be so blind? I knew he's going to choose her over me, yet I did not stop to fight for my love. I even _offered_ him a ride...just to get to Jurai...to save that bitchy princess. I almost didn't get there in time because of this stupid wound on my side. But after I looked at him...upon seeing his determination...I knew for once, I mustn't give up. 

I have to bring him there. I have to win. 

No matter what the _cost_.

I just have to succeed. If not for myself...then for him, and for the princess. For once, I am willing to do something remarkable...something I will _not_ regret...even if pain is eating me slowly and melting my entire identity. 

I want to do something to prove to those people that I am not _that _diabolical as they think I am—or rather, I _was. _And for once, I succeeded in doing that… _thing_.

Now, I think I know why am I like this. I simply know the truth.

I _sacrificed_ myself...from him...for her...for both of them.

Aeka...my rival. Impossible as it may seem...but she's my best friend. Though I will never admit it in front of her face. She'll probably laugh at me and let out her small irritating voice and destroy my eardrums. And one more thing...my pride is too much high for that. It's going to stay here, deep within. She's a fucking bitch, a no good prissy making every shy, polite move for Tenchi to notice her. Her face seemed to rage with anger every time I hugged Tenchi and began to touch his body. She's a slut, a klutz even more...she's someone I have to save...to give up my life for. 

Tenchi. Oh, a mere mention of that name makes my heart skip a thousand beats. I can still recall the first time we met. I can never forget that. His cute, soft brown eyes are so tantalizing. His angelic face never ceases to amaze me. His gentle manners draw me closer to him everyday. I am not oblivious to the fact that he was always annoyed with me whenever I touched him and hugged him tightly—no, let me change that. _Ferociously_. He thought I'm just treating him like a toy and I'm just being lustful. But it's not that way. He doesn't know that my actions are only defense mechanisms...for I'm afraid that my shell will crack and my real surface will divulge. I never want that to happen. I like to be strong always, even if it hurts me deep inside and even if my lonely soul is slowly dying. And I know that he'll never understand. 

I just wish he is mine…I'm the one he's going to save...but I'm not. I'm just _not_ the _one_. She's someone more worthy of his love. And that could never be _me_.

I felt my bloodied hand slip through my waist, down into my legs and to my chair in my spaceship almost lifelessly. Blood flowed like water and unconsciousness begins to surmount my whole being. The excruciating pain I just experienced not so long ago is starting to fade and numbness starts to cripple in my body. Then I can't feel anything anymore. I am now numb from my injury...or from something..._someone_ else?? 

I don't know anymore. It doesn't matter anyway. Especially now...now that I am dying. 

The last words I heard was a mournful cry from my cabit Ryo-ohki...perhaps the only one who understood me...and stood beside me all my life. 

To Tenchi...I hope this sacrifice is worth it. When you do get home, together with your princess, may your life be simple, less complicated, happy and most of all, full of love. Just pretend you never met me. Move on. I'll always watch over you...even if it doesn't seem so, especially to you. 

Let me take this one last chance to say these three words to you once again, even though I am certain you'll not and will never believe it. 

_I love you. _

After those thoughts, I sighed one more time… and finally welcomed the darkness that awaits me. 

**~*Owari*~**


End file.
